I've actually hated Subway since I was in middle school and the Indian Subway owner refused to let me redeem my SubClub card because all of the stamps weren't from his Subway. I sent a letter to corporate Subway which took care of everything. That and I got sprayed with water from a puddle from a passing truck. Recently, Subway has amazingly entered into my life:
My roommate Tom was on the same flight from Chicago as loveable former fatso Jared.
One of my favorite commercials on television right now is one featuring Jared and Michael Strahan. Now Strahan claims he is not gay but it doesn't help him that he speaks with a lisp and his line in the commercial is, "Twice the meat without slowing me down."
I ate at a subway on my way to Provincetown, MA yesterday.
Do you see the circle formed here? Provincetown is known for its gay population, Michael Strahan is not gay but probably is and was in a Subway commercial, I ate at a Subway on my way home from Provincetown, I get hit on by gay guys ALL THE TIME!
Anyway... Hey Jared from Subway, listen up. I have a problem with your precious little store. First of all, you wouldn't believe how easy it is to find a McDonald's or Wendy's at a rest stop but if you want to find some semblence of healthy food you shit of out luck. Second of all, when ordering my lunch yesterday (and countless other times) the plastic-gloved worker asks me which vegetables I would like. I say, "Everything except olives." This is followed by, "Do you want hot peppers?" Umm, hello didn't I just tell you everything? The whole point of saying everything is so I don't have to say anything else. And even then I still don't get spinach or carrots. Also, they advertise "The Works" so you don't have to say what you want but even this option doesn't include everything. It's a load of crap I say and it needs to end.
And in case you were wondering...I didn't get hit on by any gay people while in Provincetown. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
1 comment:
While I was in Texas this past week, including the cities of Houston,San Antonio, laredo and other small towns whose names I can't remember, I wanted to eat at a Subway. I could not find any and found it hard to healthy. Too many fatsos in that state for me.However I did manage to find frsh fruit and yogart to eat.
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